Last treatment today. Last time of 20 repeats of going to the hospital in the morning, waiting in the drab waiting room, getting called in, walking to the changing room, removing my top and wearing a hospital robe, going to the room with the machine and disrobing, lying down on the plastic table under the machine with footrest and bumrest adjusted for my size, getting prodded and moved and scribbled upon until I lie just right, waiting for the radiation while trying to breathe normally, breathing and holding when told to, getting the robe back on, jumping off the table, going back to the changing room, getting my top back on, leaving the building via a shortcut. You know you’ve been in hospital too many times when you start knowing a couple of shortcuts.

At the Bath RUH they have a ritual for the very last treatment. There’s a brass bell hanging off the waiting room wall. The patient having finished their treatment gets to ring it three times. All the radiographers come into the waiting room, and clap, and the people who are waiting clap as well - it’s surprisingly effective, everyone briefly sharing the joy of the person who’s at the end of that particular journey, probably looking forward to their own. Joe and Alice came with me for the occasion and I got a spontaneous hug from Alice, and it was an amazing feeling, just for a minute.

I didn’t have many side effects from the radiotherapy. They recommended to stay active and drink lots of water, and I did, mostly. I started running again. I did feel a little tired towards the end of the treatment, something they tell me is going to last for another week or so. Nothing like chemo though, just a touch of fatigue.

My hair is back for reals - I have a short head of hair, and I quite like the style. So convenient! And people mistake me for a man, which is funny (I got called a ‘prick’ by some dude today, a first for me). I intend to dye it soon.

My nails are growing out as well - a month after my last chemo session the slice of nail touched by the drugs turned yellow and bloodshot, and then lifted off entirely, bit like losing hair, but then for nails. The pink healthy bit has been growing steadily, and I think we’re pretty much back to normal.

My sense of smell came back about a month or so as well. I didn’t even realize I’d lost it - too gradual, probably - but suddenly I realized that I could smell various things that had disappeared from my life, from my own BO to food, and coffee. I’m glad I didn’t realize it was gone, it was like a surprise present to have it back.

And the energy! I don’t think I’m quite back to normal, but it’s still way better than it was. I had times in the last few months where it felt everyone except me was on stimulants, or I was a slow mover while the world around me was on a speeded up motion capture trip. Now I only have that feeling with Alice in the mornings, when she’s bouncing off the walls and I need my coffee.